A change of loyalty such as Chansley’s is one response cult members may have when promises made by their leaders are not fulfilled. Others who were not arrested may not face such dissonance. Because QAnon members are messaging constantly, many may continue to believe the conspiracy theories and blindly follow them.
How had I been turned against my family, my religion, my country? How could I give blind allegiance to a malignant narcissist? I would have died on command or killed on command. I slept three to four hours each night and worked seven days a week for no pay.
What can family and friends of QAnon believers (or of any other destructive cult) do?
These troubling times provide an opportunity to intervene and loosen the hold on those who were manipulated into a cult. But strategic interactions can start in simple ways:
Reach out
If you have cut off contact with someone as a result of their radicalization, reach out to them.
Start with something neutral, such as, “I’ve missed you,” or, “How are you?” If you were judgmental or harsh, try apologizing and ask for a “redo.” Resist the temptation to argue against their beliefs or explain that they have been duped. This approach is more likely to further entrench someone in their beliefs. Be compassionate, understanding that this person might be feeling confused, scared, betrayed or angry. Be non-judgmental.
Offer resources
Validate any reasonable concerns that may be contained within some of the conspiracy theories. For example, child trafficking is a real and serious issue that QAnon believers are very concerned about. If they bring this up in the context of a conspiracy theory, acknowledge it is a terrible thing and offer information on legitimate organizations that are addressing the issue.
Suggest a break from media
Encourage them to take a break from media and online activity, ideally for a week, but even a day is helpful. Suggest they take a walk, engage in activities they used to enjoy or reconnect with old friends. Share with them the music they used to love. When it becomes safe to share any of these activities in person, offer to do so.
Be willing to listen
Most important, remember that the person you knew and cared for before they were influenced by a cult still exists, and with consistent, respectful support they can gain the knowledge and strength to set themselves free.
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